Allah · Birth · God · Holistic · Life · Motherhood · Muslimah · Pregnancy · Womanhood · Women

Metamorphosis

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Metamorphosis is the word I think of when I look at this picture.

met·a·mor·pho·sis: The process of transformation from an immature form to an adult form in two or more distinct stages. A change of the form or nature of a thing or person into a completely different one, by natural or supernatural means.

This word comes to mind more often now as we approach the last month of pregnancy. During the beginning of the pregnancy, my Dad used this word to explain to me that I would soon be like a caterpillar who transitions into a butterfly. I fell in love with that concept but had very little understanding of what it meant. Now, looking at all of the changes that I have gone through so far, I begin to understand his analogy even more which makes me fall in love with it even more.

I was a caterpillar, waiting for my time. Today, I am a cocoon.

co·coon: A silky case spun for protection in the pupal stage. To envelop or surround in a protective or comforting way.

My body is serving as a cocoon, protecting our baby’s body and soul as they grow to their full potential. Soon birth will approach us and I will enter a new stage of life. This is something I look forward to so much. A new woman, a butterfly that will never be the same caterpillar. Something beautiful in it’s own way. Something I look forward to, but have no idea of what to expect… How will I feel as I emerge into something so new? How will my body feel graduating from being a cocoon for our baby? How will it feel to fly as a new person, a mother, a butterfly? What will I look like, will I turn into a butterfly with the same colors as when I was a caterpillar? What will I leave behind from my life as a caterpillar that is no longer useful to me as a butterfly? What will I bring with me, into my new being? And most interestingly, what will I learn as a brand new butterfly? What type of person will I support myself to be during this change and what will I gain during this new experience? So unknown, and so beautiful.

So beautiful, yet so much beauty still left to think of. Like the outstanding reality of The Creator who Created this experience for women to go though. “He has not given birth and was not born.” (112:3) But still, He Created for us to experience such beauty. A true blessing, an obvious mercy…

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Allah · Feminism · God · Life · Love · Motherhood · Muslimah · Pregnancy · Women

My Empowering Body.

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I am incredibly thankful my amazing body. I find myself feeling shy speaking about my body but I know that’s only because society makes women feel like their bodies are only sexually amazing. That concept bothers me, so I’m going to talk freely about why my body is so amazing. It deserves at least that much. Sadly, I’ve never felt this way about my body before my pregnancy. I’ve never felt this thankful, or this intrigued towards my body. So I’ve decided to make a list of facts that amaze me most, especially due to pregnancy:

The fact that my uterus is literally the home of my child; protecting, supporting, preparing. The fact that there is a placenta inside of me, feeding nutrients to my growing child every time my heart beats. The fact that my heart is beating to support not only my body, but my baby’s body too. The fact that my skin is literally stretching as my organs move to make room for my expanding uterus. The fact that my body is preparing to make milk to feed an actual human being. The fact that my body was made to birth a life into this world. The fact that I, Sabrina, have a baby bump. And the most amazing fact of all, that God is in control of all of it.

It so funny to me that I’ve never cared for my body the way I do now. I’ve never seen it so beautiful, or respected it so much. Never, in my entire life. I don’t understand why that is, why I was so shy to be proud of my womanhood and my female abilities. I remember in high school when we approached the “reproductive system” in health class, I couldn’t wait to be done with the chapter. I told myself it was awkward and gross. Nursing was something I didn’t want to do, because it was weird. I realize now, that the only reason it was weird is because we grow up feeling like our breasts are mostly for sexual reasons and much less for the support and bonding of our children. We don’t grow up preparing for what our bodies are made to do naturally. For example, we don’t grow up gaining an education on how to take care of your pregnancy, or how to care for yourself after birth. This isn’t in our education system so it is rarely in our knowledge. What is in our mind is the judgment, the expectations.

I saw my body as “okay” during the times it was skinny. I saw my face as “okay” during the times I wore makeup. During the times I gained weight and the times when I was bare-faced, I felt less than “okay”. Can you believe that? I can’t believe it. I can’t believe that I saw myself and my body as something less than it is. Now, I feel the complete opposite. I am so happy to be growing a child inside of me. So happy that even comments such as “Wow! You’re getting big!” and “You’re waddling.” are comments that make me smile. I am SO grateful that I have come to this time. This time in my life where I am learning how amazing my body truly is. It is beautiful, strong, and extremely empowering.

 

A special thank you to my Husband, my Family, my Midwife, and the many people who support me are helping me learn about my body and it’s abilities.