Sometimes a wave of reality hits and I’m left to wonder why I wasn’t paying closer attention to reality. Today, a wave that I really needed hit me…
It has been one of the most patience-testing weeks of my entire life, as I wait for the moment to come when I get to meet our baby. Last week, I remembered that I need to be patient, that helped but today I remembered something even better. I remembered that nearly exactly one year ago when the above picture was taken, I prayed. I prayed and asked God to bless us with the honor of having a child, not for the sake of myself and my desire to be a Mother but for the sake of Him. This, I believe, was the key. The same key to everything else in life; to do and to be, for the sake of God. When this is done, life is so much more beautiful in every way. I can promise this.
My prayer was answered, but I got caught in the illusion that this baby in my womb is all mine and my Husband’s. A gift from God, of course, but a gift that I am partially in control of. This thought of partial control is where I went wrong. I lost full grasp of the fact that this baby is an honor, a responsibility that God gave us in response to my prayer a year ago. I almost got too caught up to remember the real reason I asked for this baby. I asked for this baby so that I could raise them for the sake of God but the forgetful human characteristic in me forgot that carrying this baby and giving birth to this baby needs to be for the sake of God as well.
This wave of reality has given me a breath of fresh air and I think it is juuuuuust what I needed to get me through these last weeks of pregnancy and birth. It is also a very important lesson for me to constantly keep in mind, with every single breath of my life and every single action I take. This post is by far the most beneficial thing I have written for myself to look back at, and I hope that it is benificial to others as well.